Stress Relief: Are You Coping or Just Numbing?

Life can feel overwhelming at times—especially these days. Whether it’s work stress, family conflict, political anxiety, unresolved trauma, or the heaviness of depression, when the pressure builds, we all turn to certain behaviors to help us get through. Sometimes those behaviors are healthy coping strategies, and sometimes they are ways of numbing the pain. Most people use a mix of both to manage their mental health. The key question is: Are the ways you’re handling stress helping you heal—or just keeping you stuck?

Managing Stress: A Quick Self-Check 

Ask yourself these questions the next time you reach for your go-to stress reliever:

1. Do I feel better or worse after this activity?
   • If you feel calmer, more clear-headed, or more grounded, it’s likely a coping skill.
   • If you feel drained, guilty, or disconnected, it may be a sign of numbing.
2. Am I addressing or avoiding the stress?
   • Coping helps you work through the emotions or problems, even a little at a time.
   • Numbing keeps the problem pushed aside for later, or makes it worse. 
3. Does this give me energy, or take it away?
   • Coping often leaves you with more energy and resilience.
   • Numbing usually leaves you flat, restless, or depleted.
4. If I stop doing this, does the stress feel manageable or unbearable?
   • Healthy coping builds tolerance for discomfort.
   • Numbing makes the discomfort feel bigger once the distraction is gone.

coping vs. numbing: everyday examples

Coping: journaling, calling a trusted friend, going for a walk, practicing deep breathing, attending therapy, creating something, or setting boundaries.

Numbing: substance use to avoid or escape feelings, overeating, endless scrolling, oversleeping, binge-watching, or avoidance.

There’s nothing wrong with distraction in small doses—we all need breaks and boundaries (hello The Summer I Turned Pretty marathon!) The difference is whether the activity helps you return to your life with more clarity, or whether it keeps you from facing what’s really going on.

feeling overwhelmed? you don’t have to manage this alone

If you’re struggling with trauma, depression, or substance use, it’s easy to fall into numbing just to get through—but real healing is possible. As a Certified Advanced Drug and Alcohol Counselor (CAADC) trained in trauma treatment and EMDR, I’ve helped clients at Lifeologie Counseling Grand Rapids in Ada move beyond survival mode to discover healthier coping, lasting relief, and moments of joy again. Therapy offers a safe, supportive space to begin that shift, and I’d be honored to support you on your healing journey. 

In Michigan, you can call (616) 929-0248 to book a therapy session with me virtually or in person. Elsewhere, search by specialty or location to find a creative, compassionate Lifeologie therapist near you.