How Embracing Real Emotions Plays a Critical Role in Suicide Prevention

When we talk about suicide prevention, it’s easy to focus on statistics, warning signs, and sharing crisis resources. You’ll hear “Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself.” Those pieces are critical: recognizing warning signs, understanding vulnerability, and building community truly matter. But here’s the thing—real suicide prevention also means learning to sit with our emotions, and making room for other people’s real, messy feelings, too.

can't choose joy?

Spoiler: emotions aren’t “good” or “bad.” They’re simply signals—telling us what’s happening inside, moment by moment. They’re also fleeting, shifting all day long—totally normal, by the way. Of course, most of us would pick happiness over sadness every time. But that doesn’t mean happy and joyful emotions are always “good,” or that sadness and despair are “bad.” Remember Sadness in “Inside Out?” She was the key to saving core memories.

Still, no shocker here: our culture paints some emotions as villains. If you’re not happy all the time, relentlessly positive, or grateful for literally everything, you might feel like something’s wrong with you—that you "need to change your mindset." Enter toxic positivity: the belief that we should only ever feel “positive vibes.” If you can’t “choose joy,” you’re the problem. That mindset can erase and invalidate normal human feelings like sadness, anger, and grief. The result? People who can’t find a silver lining start feeling even more alone, which can spiral into depression or suicidal thoughts.

“good” and “fine” aren’t emotions

Most of us didn’t learn emotional vocabulary in school. Think about it—how many feeling words can you name off the top of your head? (Hint: “good” and “fine” don’t count.) Checking in on a friend isn’t helpful if all you’re hoping for is a quick “I’m good” in return. Real emotional connection starts with checking in on yourself: can you name and own how you’re really feeling? Then, checking in on others means asking how they *actually* are—and holding space for their honest answer. Emotional regulation isn’t about shutting down those tough feelings; it’s about letting yourself experience emotions without them putting you or anyone else in harm’s way. For your loved ones, it means giving them a safe space to be honest, even when things feel dark.

sometimes, life just sucks

Let’s normalize it: sometimes, life is really hard. There’s not always an upside to loss, heartbreak, or hardship. And that’s okay. You don’t have to immediately “find the positive” in loss or pain, and struggling to do so doesn’t mean you’re stuck or broken. All emotions—yes, even the ugly ones—are part of moving forward. By talking honestly about grief, anger, and despair, we show others they’re not alone, and maybe, help someone step out of the darkness. If we do enough of this real talk, maybe fewer folks will slip through the cracks. Intervention matters—especially when someone’s struggling with suicidal thoughts—but prevention starts earlier, by making it safe to talk about our real experiences.

Normalizing these tough emotions won’t end suicide overnight, but it can help build a world where no one has to feel alone in what they’re carrying.

If you or someone you know is thinking about suicide please seek help immediately. Call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline at 988. If you're struggling with depression, grief, and thoughts of self-harm, or if you or someone you know is struggling with thoughts of suicide, a compassionate therapist can meet you where you are and help you begin to heal. Find a Lifeologie therapist near you who specializes in suicial ideations and thoughts of self harm at wefixbrains.com.